Our Newest Baby

This week I am officially at the halfway point in this pregnancy!!  And yesterday was my mid-term anatomy ultrasound.  I was able to drop my oldest 5 kids at a friend's house, and my mother-in-law, mom, and youngest went to the doctor's office. 

What I love about the place I'm going to is that the neonatologist I am under (while being seen by midwives) does my ultrasounds.  He is the formost 4D ultrasound doctor in the area, so he does things quickly and efficiently.  What used to take me an hour with the tech at the other place took 20 minutes with him!  He also asked if we were finding out the gender, to which I said "YES"!! 

I had this feeling I am carrying a girl, although at my last check up the heartbeat was 140-150s which is what my boys were, so I waivered a little.  But the past week I felt a strong girl 'vibe'. 

He checked my cervix to see if there was a change indicating preterm labor.  Everything looks great and sealed tightly shut!  So then, he went straight to the reason I was so excited.  He asked me first, "What do you think you're having."  and I said, "I think it's a girl."  He took a look and said,

"Looks like the girls have it!  It's a girl!"

Fionna is just over the moon excited to be getting another sister.  Kayson was super disappointed at first, but today he is feeling much better about it. 

Now, Bram and I need to find the perfect name for our little girl! All we know right now is her middle name will be "Ann" after his Nana Brow.  (his Nana Jones' middle name is "Anna" which is pretty cool!) 

She was shy.

A Rainbow of Hope...and Fear

After the Great Flood in Genesis, God put a rainbow up in the sky, to show His promise to the earth.  Today, whenever we see a rainbow, it reminds us of God's promises, and that He never breaks them.  It gives us hope, knowing we are loved by a God who keeps his covenants with His people.

A miscarriage is one of the biggest storms a family can go through.  It has dark, dark days.  The sun never seems to shine.  All is despairing and gloomy.  And sometimes God sends a rainbow.  A Rainbow Baby is a baby conceived after a loss...whether that loss is a miscarriage, still birth, or newborn death.  It is the beauty after the storm.

Last week, during our flu escapade that lasted 5 days, we found out we are expecting again.  Seeing those 2 pink lines gave me such mixed emotions!  I was elated, excited, and surprised.  And with that came the fear. 
"What if I lose this one, too?"

God is in control over all things.  And He loves and cares for me and my children both living and in heaven.  If He chooses to take this child to be with Him in heaven, then that is His will.  I have comfort and joy knowing that I will see my children again in heaven someday.  And if He mercifully allows this child to remain on this earth, we will love and cherish him and raise him up to love the Lord. 

Everyday brings joy knowing there's a little life inside of me.  Some days I have mini panic attacks that wash over me like a wave.  I have to calm myself down.  Pray.  Beg God to give me His peace.  I know it's normal to be hyper-aware of every twinge, every cramp, every strange feeling after a miscarriage.  I am trying my best to trust in the Lord and give my cares, my baby, into His loving arms.

So, here we go again!

 Baby Sortwell #8 is on it's way!

Thoughts on Husbands

Everyone talks about how women need compliments about their appearance so their confidence, self esteem, whatever, is boosted.  I personally love it when my husband says something nice about me.  But do you ever, as a wife, say nice things about your husband's body to him?  I'm not talking sexual things...I'm talking compliments. 

The other day, my husband and I were getting ready for bed, and he was trying to see his back muscles in the mirror.  He said, "Back muscles are kind of annoying.  You can't look at them and enjoy what they look like."  I replied, "Well I certainly enjoy them.  You look great."  The look on his face was just so eye opening for me.  He looked so pleased and happy that I would say that.  He was like, "Really?  Ok, well that's good, I suppose,"  and smiled wide.

We as wives need to be encouraging our husbands by telling them things like this.  We aren't the only ones who appreciate a compliment on our bodies.  They need to know that we love and admire their bodies, just like they do to ours.  It encourages them, and makes them feel good. 

Especially if your husband is into working out and fitness.  He needs to hear that he is making progress, or that you appreciate what he's doing.  Even if you already thing he looks amazing, he may be insecure. 

Now for a little husband bragging on my part...

I never noticed my husband had gotten quite large after our wedding.  He decided he wanted to try a Tough Mudder obstacle course in 2014.  I thought he was crazy, but he was determined.  He started working out to prepare, and he lost about 33lbs.  Looking at old pictures one day, I was astounded that he was so big at one time!  I had never noticed, and I thought he was always my Hot Guy.  In all, he has lost 55lbs. and even so, he steps on the scale and sighs because he isn't losing the weight he wants to.  I always tell him to stop obsessing...he looks great, and it will come off with all of the hard work he puts into his fitness. I love my man, and appreciate all he does!